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  • Dawn

Limiting beliefs...table for one!

I am sure many of you have read this question before...what would you do if you knew you could not fail? If you really take a second to unpack that, the bigger question is, what is the definition of failure? Isn't it relative and personal to each individual? As I get older, I can tell you with absolute certainty my definition of failure has changed drastically. And it now centers around the word "try", as in, I have succeeded if I at least try. Swing the bat, start the race, whatever it might be, did you try? I do believe that limiting beliefs are not things we are born with. They are seeds planted by others about us. The unfortunate thing is, in so many cases, we never stop to question if these beliefs are even accurate. And what is worse, we start to change our actions based on an opinion of someone who doesn't know us well. Think about that for a moment. You have been with you a pretty long time and hopefully have a long time to go but yet a person who maybe has met you a few times or even if they work with you, gets to decide what you are good at or not? It's laughable, isn't it? But I get it. Everyone wants validation and approval of some sort from the outside world. Nothing wrong with that at all. But when the world isn't singing your praises or is flat out stating you cannot do something, what is your reaction? I work for an organization in which there is an executive or two who does not appreciate what I bring to the table. It took me a bit but I have 150% decided they can go pound sand. (I cleaned that up....a lot!) They have decided what they think someone in my current role should do, be, say and I don't fit the bill. Ten years ago, that would have been devastating to me and I would put a lot of effort in trying to change their opinion. Those days are gone. I still need to tow the line somewhat as it relates to doing my job but for the majority of it, I do my job the way I think it should be done, based on my own skillset, not what others believe. Honestly, it is fairly refreshing to accept that many, many people in your life will not be your biggest fans. Recognize it and move on. You were not made to beg people for acceptance. But also know, there will be also be a group who are just neutral. They don't send barbed comments your way, but they also don't stand up and cheer either. And that is okay. Trust me, your tribe will show itself as time goes on. As I look to hit the big 5-0 in about nine months, I have put more time to understanding when am I the happiest with myself and I will tell you, it is not necessarily tied to results. It's way more about effort. Am I sitting on the proverbial couch or did I jump up and participate? Frankly, there are a ridiculous number of things I want to try before my final days. Chances are good I won't get to them all but that will be my choice, not because someone's else limiting beliefs about me has caused me to question whether or not I can even do those things. To that I say "Hell No!" and I hope you will say the same!

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